Brogan sounds similar to Bridget...sorta.
Every girl's name is automatically translated to "Baby/Milk Carrier" in my brai
So theres a slight possibility i may not graduate according to planned because i was out getting laid instead of studying. And im okay with that.
WHAT DO YOU MEAN I DIDN'T APOLOGIZE? THERE WAS A PEACE OFFERING MADE VIA TACO BELL.
He showed up 3 hours late wearing roller skates and acted like nothing was wrong with that.
Just bought a breathalyzer and Sharpies, guess who thought of a new drinking game
his face was nice enough, but his choice of footwear screamed columbian drug lord
The guy who was The Count on Sesame Street died this week too. Therefore, you should take multiple shots, count them, & go "ahh aaahh aaaahhh" after each one. I expect video...
I have no idea. He was just running around wearing a horse mask yelling "bumfuck" repeatedly. We figured we'd just let him get it out of his system.
At one point 12 people dressed in care bear onesies were up on stage grinding super nasty, and two of the girl Care Bears were making out.
If this wasn't a hallucination, we need to go to this magical kingdom every night of the week.
We're over by the bouncy castles. I'm the one wearing a baby. Bring Twizzlers.
What's the point of bringing a Jack and Coke to work if my boss is just gonna piss and moan about me day drinking again?
She picked me up from the bar in her underwear.
I don't particularly remember setting a firecracker off in my hand. No more tequila.
I mean, if you want to light yourself on fire for maximum accuracy, far be it from me to stop you
congrats on being the token straight people in our group.
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