not only did i climb through the window at 4 am but here i am 4 hours later for my interview at the mall and i'm staring in the dark pet store barking at puppies
we were having sex and she freaked out when i said nipple
how in the hell can u get pulled over when ur car is parked.
It went from "haha, this will be funny" to "full blown anime porn fetish"
She checked into foursquare right as she left work so he would think she was there late and not on some other guy's dick
I have to say for barely passing high school, that girl is a genius.
When that rick ross song came on he started ripping up dollar bills and pouring out drinks on the floor. I'm all for ignorance but it was a little excessive for a wedding
do you think a sharp knife would stab through a cheese suit?
It's been hot as balls outside. It's like getting tea bagged by the Sun.
I really resent how she stayed home and ruined my plans to watch sci-fi and masturbate.
I love spring semester, so many high school girls visiting that think I'm the sexiest man alive just because I'm in college
Aren't you gay?
IT'S NICE TO FEEL WANTED DON'T RUIN THIS FOR ME
I AM EATING BACON AND CHEESE. FUCK THE BULLSHIT.
I love that you'd blow off your high school reunion to get shit faced in an aquarium with us
Um. We all know how I feel about sea life
Was i rolling around in a parking lot last night
Is there such thing as a tasteful dick pic? I think I just got one if they exist.
He is saved in her phone as Sir. Mindfuck <3/ vag cleaner of course I need to meet him.
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