I gotta feeling the economic climate has killed the housewife market
She made me repeat after her: "I take responsibility for what I put in my own mouth."
There are thorn wounds on my balls, don't ever question my dedication to party again
We were making out in the bushes when some dude comes and starts peeing beside us.
He really likes Obama...and Bill Clinton too. He said "I mean, how many presidents can say that they got head in the oval office?"
Soulmates.
According to the transitive property, he has now had dick in his mouth.
How the hell did he get a boner in that type of situation?
All I got from that conversation with the officer was "blah blah blah, you're disgusting, blah blah blah, $500 fine, blah blah blah, be in court Tuesday."
Imma need a double jack on the rocks and a BJowsky from the hot bartender.
Yes I said BJOWSKY. Pronounced "buh jow skii".
note: just because the casino is called bourbon street, it doesn't mean you can puke and keep walking and no one will care. chalk me up for another 86
She's lucky her pussy is worth listening to her ramble about bedroom furniture for 30 minutes
Like the fear of satan was put into my heart when I saw him put that sandwich on the WOODEN BENCH
His balls will have been in my mouth at least once by this time tomorrow.
So our night ended with 6 cruisers, a fire truck, and an ambulance. Also, lots of blood. How was yours?
Didn't know my clit could produce that many orgasms in one night. Fuck my husband; think I might have to become a lesbian.
Randomize
