you just love her because she lets you bang her with fruits and veggies!
I feel like sober is me a distant relative that I only see on christmas..
I think I might have accidentally had a threesome last night with two good friends. See, this is what happens when you leave me.
He told me that I smelled like a Glade Plug-in, then sang the Menard's jingle in it's entirety in between kissing me.
Sooo just headbutted a stripper, meet you outside
4 girls bringing me taco bell. this is what dreams are made of.
I THINK I JUST JOINED A GANG. PLEASE PICK ME UP.
This is home. And home is where you find your family. And you try not to make out with your family.
He smells like cinnamon, and what I imagine to be orgasms
My fridge door just caught on fire somehow.
My heart wants him and my vagina wants him...to have a bigger dick.
Today, I lack passion for anything but Taco Tuesday.
go for it girl, the world is ur dick oyster
No one should have to go to work between Christmas and New Years, but here I am twirling in my office chair and putting Jack in my coffee like I’m back in college studying for finals.
I’m torn. She’s crazy - like legitimately “Wear your skin as a suit” crazy. But her blow jobs and dirty talk are Pornhub quality!
Randomize
