I'll just stay a virgin forever then
You still have to go anyway
Then I guess I'll have to start sleeping around
Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
It's pretty bad when the convenient store clerk can tell you that you're earlier than usual for visiting the store.
I just farted. And everybody around me is looking at the fat girl to my left. I win.
Listen, it's not like I meant to bust the window out. It just sort of happened. And I'm also sorry for stealing your dads bandanas.
There are apples in the microwave and a cup of twigs in the fridge. I think she's hiding in the pantry, I can hear her giggling. Leaving her to it.
Her vagina felt like a fur coat. It was weird at first but I kinda liked it
I don't mean to ruin your favorite Disney movie...but...we both came when Mufasa died.
I am 100% planning on being drunk on Wednesday. This is America. Work or no work.
i've been hiding in the laundry chute for like thirty minutes from her. not my manliest moment. but dude this is awesome
He spelled Steven with "ph", needless to say my nose was almost bleeding from the amount of axe he was wearing.
You don't know what lonely is until you've came in an Arby's Napkin
You're incredible, and I'm drunk
I have vodka, fruit gushers, and health insurance. Let's party.
It was only a blow job in his car. It's the same as giving a friend a back rub.
Randomize
