i have a feeling tonight will end in rehab
so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
All i remember as you were making ramen is that you kept slurring "i like you as a color"...
i guess i had fun last thursday night because when i got on the drunk bus this thursday night everyone immediatley started chanting my name and telling me to do a bus flip
whats a bus flip?
idk but apparently i invented it
I was gonna make fun of her but that plan kinda stopped once she put my dick in her mouth
from now on when you get up to pee in the middle of the night, check to see if im sleeping in your parking lot.
i do.
The two guys from next door helped him do a backflip. The ended up throwing him halfway through a ceiling tile. Don't worry, we fixed it with duct tape.
thats the coolest thing thats happened to my vagina since i dated that guy from portugal.
i'm sick of coming in second next to bourbon.
Middle of vacation, he walked into an audition for a Broadway musical in a drunken stupor. I think he got the part.
Star Trek does not adequately answer all the questions that I have about alien genitals
I just almost caught my floor on fire, then decided I could put it out with my knuckles! So I'm doing good!
I need a good cry or an orgasm and neither of them are gonna happen to me and i'm so frustrated
I wanna riverboat gamble on your vaginal waters. Just sayin
Oh? And how would you explain this to your kids?
"Well pumpkin, when mommies and daddies have loved each other so much for a really long time, sometimes they trade off with other mommies and daddies"
Randomize
