Told my mom a bit ago she'd meet you tonight
Um...??
She's excited
ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
thats it. im googling how to make you boobs smaller. this is getting out of control.
She made a list of the things each of us had done wrong and assigned a point system. Guess who came out the loser?
We need you. We already made it on global news and are drunk at the election party.
Don't you dare blame me for walking in one walking in on ur fuck session....u decided to fuck where we hid our booze
Her virginity is one of the last things that remains of our childhood.
Watching him is like watching a star slowly implode
It happened again.
What?
I lost in a drinking contest with my 84 year old grandmother. Two years in a row now.
correction: my vagina hates that I'm smart.
You know you're doing well in life when weed is considered to improve your job performance
Just had to double check that I had pants on. THAT kind of weekend.
I haven’t sent any nudes yet in 2018.
That’s not true...is it?
He adjusted my bra straps while I blew him.
she compared me favorably to her vibrator
which one?
Randomize
