The KFC double down is way too much for a drunk. He was just staring at it in awe.
At one point I was double fisting both beer & ice cream. I love public events in this town.
after last night my drinking related hospital bracelet collection is up to 13
It's ok. Rob's just shotgunning upside down.
i love him because he let me keep my UGGS on while we had sex
You don't seem to appreciate the rareness of his junk.
Send me a picture. I'm more of a visual learner.
I swear god is testing me by giving me awesome guys with tiny penises
OH MY GOD I JUST WANT TO GO HOME AND FART ALL NIGHT.
The effect you have on my penis from a different state is impressive
Buying the inflatable beer pong table for the pool was one of the best investments I've ever made
I may or may not have hooked up with the cop who arrested me.. Or I can cross hooking up with a stripper in a cop outfit off my bucket list.
Is a swingers hotel appropriate for an anniversary?
Can you please stop having such an active social life? I'm tryna get fucked over here
is caitlin alive?
ya she's alive she's watching a movie
ok remind her she drank toilet water then.
Can you cover for me after lunch? I’ve never seen a guy who cums as much as my new Side Dick so now I need to clean the house before my husband gets home
Randomize
