what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
Roman Polanski is more welcome at my daughter's birthday party than you are at that bar
She definitely looked like a troll, but I had take one for the team. Or at least thats what I keep telling myself
Even my vagina gasped.
Seius question. Does a penis floar when ina baht? Must find out.
Gees I domt know what your deal was. You kept looking at Nick and shaking your head frantically and doing a weird motion with your hands
Tgat was the small dick alert
Went to an open-bar law school party and puked in front of Justice Scalia. My legal career is now complete -- I literally got judged by a U.S. Supreme Court Justice. Can't get any higher than that.
Woke up naked next to Alex and he was braiding my hair and then commented on how healthy my hair was. I don't even know anymore..
I woke up to 76 pages of e's, r's, d's, and f's from when I fell asleep for 3 hours on my laptop keyboard trying to write that paper.
i could've stared at her spine forever man..she was so deep, and she made a drink out of vodka and organic mangoo shit. i will find her and present that goddess with some fucking gummies
you're no longer allowed out of my sight at parties
I told her shower beers are even better when you have someone in there with you and she said she's been looking for a new drinking buddy. It's a goooooo
I was laying out of the open window, talking with him on the phone, while we were both puking at the same time.. Guys at the party called it "true love"..
Because cocaine and lesbian hookups on a Tuesday cannot be the new normal
I'm just too horny to handle empty house
She's better-looking with the mask on.
Randomize