is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
Sorry I didn't wanna double team his sister. Having whiskey dick and watching you get laid didn't sound appealing
It's going to be great. We're a perfect team to break up marriages and happiness.
Or maybe my penis is just the key to their locked boxes of crazy, and I unleash their wrath upon all of mankind just so I can get my nut off
Impressive. I've never gotten straight denied and then chased the guy naked out of my own apt. I'll remember that next time.
Woke up eating a pickle on the bathroom floor this morning in some random guys sweat pants.
Well at least ssomeone is or the state is tafing over ir in twligiob
I feel like asking for a towel for after I puke before I puke to be more respectful than jus going outside to puke and coming back inside covered in sweat and tears.
I'm bonding with your girlfriend. I like her. We're plotting your demise.
Is it okay to mention my ambition to become a supervillian and kill all humans on a first date, or is that a second date discussion?
Every time I download Tinder again, I hate myself a little more.
We both knew it was over when I took a u turn at her belly button.
All I know is I woke up with my apartment door wide open, naked, and I poured an entire bottle of Advil on my bed to sleep in.
i still cant feel my toes or walk straight...its been 2 days.
you tried to strip tease your way into canada but got arrested instead. don't worry, your mom doesn't know.
Randomize