I heard Topanga got a DUI. I need that mugshot asap.
I think its a sure sign I need to get laid when every cloud in the sky looks like a penis.
Your therapist is not going to think that you using your vagina as revenge is okay
Grandma just handed out bail money... it's officially christmas
my roommate just showed up covered in dirt, drunk....with a whole ice cream cake that says "it's a girl".
You sir are most definitely in. Better get your penis an umbrella as that bad boy is gonna get soakkkkkkeddddd.
I may have just unintentionally roofied a man in a wheelchair
And if it ever comes down to tax or healthcare benefits we can get married
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
Amazon.com "suggested" I buy both nipple clamps and opera gloves.
You drunkenly promised dick pics on your way out the door and then never delivered. I don't know how I'll ever be able to trust you again.
I am sorry. I am also on acid.
Pretty sure the guy at the Halloween party dressed as an ice cream man is working his way through the building without a care for gender or age. He high-fives me on his way out each morning.
I think i just made eye contact with his roommate... while doing reverse cowgirl. Yup i have no shamee
THERE'S MORE TO LIFE THAN JUST MISSIONARY
Anything special planned for Valentines Day?
Does testing the strength of my coworker’s marriage count?
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