I won a flip cup tournbment! Why is boot and rally so hard when youre old?
I really wish i had a penis so i could dick slap that bitch right now
yes we were fucking thats why i put "watching a movie" in quotations
I walked in on him shirtless licking the mirror while talking to his reflection. So yes, I definitely want to do shrooms the next time you get them.
Changing from sweatpants to jeans at 3 in the afternoon makes the day seem so much more productive than it actually was.
So you had sex with my brother?
It sounds like you dont need me to answer that.
we've had sex 4 times and he still refers to me as 'the chick in my chem class'
don't ever tell me how terrible your next walk of shame is until you run into your little brother on his way to class.
Gees I domt know what your deal was. You kept looking at Nick and shaking your head frantically and doing a weird motion with your hands
Tgat was the small dick alert
Drunk puking in my bathtub has plugged it up for the third time this year. I hate these calls to my landlord.
I've used my house key more to do bumps of coke than I've used it to get in my house.
I do have a life. It just consists of making scarves and chesse straws now
This isn't just a hangover. I can feel the blood moving through my veins, and it hurts.
They sleep with other people as long as there is no oral. Logic and reason were thrown out the window a long time ago with them.
i just want a position where we can lock up like some sort of sexual megatron and go the whole night that way
Randomize
