I ran out of diet so I'm mixing captain with a juice box. Being a mom has finally paid off.
new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
i googled waterboarding like you asked. as long as you do it outside. we have carpet. but i wont be a part of it.
He dropped me off at 4 in the morning because I made fun of Pearl Jam..
we got hammered off table wine and i ended up biting my acrylic nail off so i could finger his butt.. ill never look at valentines day the same
Went to get my tattoo today. Found out the piercing girl is bi. I may just get my nipples done to get hit on tomorrow. Confidence is low these days.
seriously when did my vagina become a soup kitchen for the poor
Slept in my car last night. It snowed. I peed on the street. Hello 29...
Let me shower first- i smell like sex and rock climbing (not so sure how that happened)
if i dont text back till morning its cause i turned my phone off and changed my password to something i wont remember to stop myself from drunk texting...RESPONSIBILITY
It's not even 11, i dropped a shot glass, nick is bleeding, and everyone is drunk
I found my soulmate. Behold my idiot as we spaz into the sunset.
Well I want to be mistreated and called a slut and finger banged
But I guess hugs would be nice
What's the tour de bar? Is that a thing, or is it just what you call Saturdays?
Tell her that we understand the angle wasn't the best on the first video and that we forgive her.
Randomize