I had a party to get rid of booze. Woke up with even more. Will do this till I can open a liquor store
and then he put stevie wonder on to fuck to...and hummed along as I blew him
It's gonna be pretty hard to find a homeless person that takes crackers as currency.
There are too many people on this bus for it to be even REMOTELY okay that I'm wearing a puke covered sweater
one of them held the wheel while the other one changed her pants. while driving. on the thruway. what
his life revolves around getting high and answering people on yahoo answers. he's perfect for you.
I think i lit a firework with a joint. happy birthday, america?
Obviously a higher power wants us to be sunday drunk together
Pictures of drunk me in a bike helmet are like McDonald's collectible toys. There's sooo many, but NO ONE has seen all of them.
Watching my ex make out with another girl is weird.
But she's wearing a jumpsuit so I feel better.
This girl invited us back on the promise of weed and strudel...she delivered neither.
Dude. Woke up this morning wearing that chick's panties. 8/10, would recommend. I love tequila.
I dipped out before he woke up, but I made sure to take the pizza with me.
dude the water is back on, you can stop shitting under the tree . . .
I kept yelling "BY ORDER OF THE PEAKY FUCKING BLINDERS" in a terrible brummie accent at everyone I saw wearing a flatcap.
Randomize