I just saw the girl you left with - Chris Hansen's looking for you
thats the last time i clean cum out of my retainer.
God gave me these boobs for a reason other than for people to throw things down them.
been home a week and haven't blacked out yet. i miss college
We have to talk through the words with friends chat so his gf won't find out
I thought about donating plasma but thats not the way i want to find out that i have aids
He said in a slur "I go so hard, even when I..." and cut himself off by projectile vomiting all over the ice luge.
Id fuck him but only at his house and he had to stay im bed till i left. He only works upper body. It just creeps me out how tiny his legs are
Yeah we invited her back for chicken nugget sandwiches
Do you ever get high and look at your cat and feel like you know them on an intellectual level?
man sorry about that. It's like god was willing me to be an asshole. I haven't filled my quota for the day
I'll probably just end up banging you in your parents marital bed,in their honor of course.
Nothing says "sober up, you whore" quite like an early morning PAP smear.
Guess whose grandma smokes weed?
Now I am free. And I want to go meet men. My phone deleted all my contacts, and I consider this to be a new beginning. With a new man in my phone book.
Randomize
