No it only became awkward when she walked in with her new boyfriend and we realized we'd all banged her
Whoa! I think of you when I eat cottage cheese.
My dad is complaining about how his computer keeps getting viruses. I don't have the heart to tell him he needs to stop downloading so much porn.
I decided that not getting a job after college is gods way of telling me I will make a great housewife
All I remember from my 21st is crying because the bouncer made him put his shirt back on
My vagina is depressed thinking about her future.
I thought she was being abused so tried to go in at the sympathy angle, but the bruises were from pole dancing. I went in at all angles.
I'm stoned entirely off resin. Licking my blankets. Merry Christmas. Jesus died for our sins. Yay Jesus. I love you.
I HAVE A GENTLEMANLY VAGINA.
That's right. I did.
You are the saddest 25 year old gay man I've ever had the displeasure of knowing.
Closed my eyes in the shower and got really dizzy. Not sure if neurological or result of 4 day vodka binge. Send help.
So please don't worry, but I need some help getting blood out of my drywall so I can get my security deposit back. I would not ask if the need was not great.
I just watched my ex butt chug a quart of eggnog. Why did I dump her again?
Anybody can graduate from college sober. You try it while being stoned every day for the last three years. 2.75 baby.
Do you think in an oreo forest they would have rivers of milk?
Randomize
