After going down on me he either said "there, it's over" or "there's an odor"... I couldn't hear him and was too embarrassed to ask him to repeat himself. I just got dressed, grabbed my bag, and left. So I don't think there's gunna be a second date. =(
Because of no shave november, it's no boys december... pay back
don't worry about the poodle she's always like that. she's like 14 years old and ate a bag of weed when she was a puppy.
My mother's day gift to my mother is to promise never to tell her 95% of the stories I've accumulated in my life.
On my way home I stopped at target and bought beer and galoshes. I am a planner.
Seriously... Things should be way more awkward... The entire female half of the bridal party INCLUDING THE BRIDE blew me in high school....
I'm getting flash backs of last night. They're coming in song form.
So the stripper who poured a beer on my head also gives great head. Even she doesn't know why she went home with me. No more mystery shot challenges.
Nothings harder than putting on a frozen condom.. or should I say softer
Fool me once shame on you. Fool me twice and I'm the idiot missing half an eyebrow again.
i'm covered in glitter and body paint WTF
We're showing the video later bring pizza
is it too much for me to say that i have a ziplock bag with ice in it in my underwear?
Omg the sex was so good my ears popped. Thank god too. Cause then I didn't have to hear him going on and on about his dumbass feelings. It's called a booty call bitch.
This is Ryan, Kristin's husband. I don't know if you meant to send that pic to me at 3am. You may want to call Kristin. Neat piercing though.
I think I may have just hit a new slutty low! ..... Just purchased the Costco pack of condoms... $9.99/48 pack = amazing deal! The judgement when I bust out the value pack = priceless!!!
Randomize
