So I have to go swallow an entire zebra. Ur on ur own girl.
i wonder what thom yorke's orgasms sound like
Just looked at my call log. I called Planned Parenthood at 3am.
I'm not saying I want a booty call. I just want what Cory and Topanga had.
He gave me an orgasm with his left hand...and he's right handed. Of course he's a keeper.
apparently breaking a beer bottle and then throwing up in a urinal is a terrible way to pick up girls.
I don't not like him. It's just wierd talking to him because we both know I fucked his wife.
You see.... Im at the point in my life where pissing in a toilet is a luxury for me
2nd fun fact: he has a square tan line around his dick.
He seems to have a lot of things figured out and most of the answers involve bourbon
The only way to make beer can wizard staffs any better is to sew your own wizards robe and hat to go along with it. welcome to tuesday nights at my new apartment
Operation "Inform her family she stars in a sadistic lesbian porn film" is in full effect. She picked the wrong guy to cheat on.
I'm pretty sure I did the Macarena with a gay guy while shot gunning a beer
You need to be full form and virile tomorrow so I can live vicariously through your rub and tug.
I use my feet as sexual weapons
Randomize
