just thought you should know that she got home at about 6am.... totally wasted. she was locked out and when i finally came to the door she was on a patio across the street with some random making hotdogs on somebodys elses bbq.
She can't keep using her latex allergy as an excuse to go bareback with everyone.
Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
dude i doubt hes gay
I CAUGHT HIM BEATING OFF TO MENS HEALTH!
sounds like you fell off the wagon.
fuck falling off. at this point, the wagon is a dot on the horizon.
Haha, you kept saying the cop was going to give you a ride home b/c "that's his job, it's summer."
Also I have uncooked pasta. I was hoping that could get cooked at your place. Don't ask about the circumstances that I came into ownership of uncooked pasta
Did you hook up with him before or after he shaved off half of his eyebrow?
I have poison ivy on my dick
WHAT
A homeless man gave him a blanket and an ambulance drove him to sarahs...
Someone explain to me why I woke up to find a stolen shopping cart in my room...
I'm sorry, I'm tired, I can't play long distance cockblock anymore. Good night don't get too pregnant.
Having random cyber sex while watching to catch a predator just seems wrong.
how did i manage to wake up with my bra on backwards?
That was the first time i’ve been physically intimidated by a LinkedIn profile.
Randomize
