It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
READY
for what?
TO HAVE SEXXXX
i think you have the wrong number
Dude, I couldnt get it up cause she said her parents were home...
ok, come over...I have doritos
My boss' voice literally gives me gas
The stories of what you did in Cuba got home before you.
Joey just asked me if I ever got anything stuck in my vag.
was it embarrassing when you had to say yes?
peeing off your aunts pourch into the koy pond seemed like a good idea at the time
just found glitter in my belly button...seriously when will this nightmare end
The sales associate looked at me funny for wobbling in the heels i was trying on until i told her i was trying to see how well i'd be able to drunk walk in these tonight
I feel like my teeth are caked on with other teeth. What did I just smoke?
This guy just told me he wanted to bathe in bong water with me and then tried to lick my nipple through my bra. This could be love.
Spent fifteen minutes in the car thinking i was psychic before i realized the cd was not on shuffle
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but a penn state hat. We are....
Stop inviting Kevin over. The dickless wonder started playing some strange Sci-FY music and speaking an alien language and the girls split.
Sorry I totally pulled a home invasion on you last night
That was super inconsiderate of me
Randomize
