What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
mustard is like jesus in yellow tights
That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
Dude, everyone in your family has slept with that girl. Her vagina is like the Hindu version of a Bar Mitzvah.
Stop making excuses. You can be here in 5 and cumming in 10
EARTHQUAKE STATUS DRINKING GAME
I had to stop mid sex to take my turn on words with friends so he wouldn't get suspicious. Hookup of the night helped me. We won.
He's so drunk he thinks he's the ultimate warrior. Told cops he was from parts unknown. Never broke character
Would it be weird if your parents sold me weed?
I tripped while walking across the stage and while trying to pick my diploma back up my flask fell out in front of the dean
Naw man, if he's crazy enough to jerk off on a public bus he's too crazy for me to fuck with
Hey, don't blame me for the shitty evening; I wasn't the one who promised hookers, Dos Equis and foster kittens. Keith was.
Things he has managed to cum on so far on spring break: my bikini, my back-up bikini, three of my four bras, two pairs of panties, four beds, six chairs, the floor of several hotel rooms, the window/door to the balcony from both sides, my tits, my face, my stomach, his stomach, my ass, his best friend's girlfriend's face, and his best friend's dick.
Just FYI spring break is over and you're supposed to be back in class but hey sounds like you had your orgy so congrats.
Who knew removing piercings would be so radical?
I've just realized that today's rations have consisted of turkey bacon and jack Daniels.
Randomize
