it's business casual sex. like no kissing, shake hands after, occasional frequency
Prostitute standing on the corner thrusting at cars as they drive by. New marketing strategy?
were drug buddies, doing lines off her ass is just a bonus
I sobered up in the middle of it, that I was hooking up with him in a rosemary bush. I woke up smelling like a pasta dish
New low reached: a cockroach has actually drowned itself in our dirty dishes. We are heathens. Cleaning dance party tonight. No excuses.
Nothing like putting a Percocet up your nose because you spent your night drinking heavily and can't drink water to make you heavily reconsider your life choices
You are attracted to power and since you can't date the married old guy you have to go for the next best thing - his gay son
Why are there four guys spooning on the living room floor?
They're still there? Shit. They were supposed to leave after they hugged it out.
I'm laughing at the fact that I'm at Target right now buying vitamins and alcohol.
I just had sex with the kid I walked next to at my first holy communion
found my cat trying to steal a lighter to hide away for himself. cat what are you doing. don't pocket my lighter.
I hope no one at work can tell or smell that I have tequila in my hair and I haven't showered for days
I got a 93 percent on my last mid term and I was drunk. Think of the possibilities if i were sober for the one thats tommorrow.
I SHOULD BE TERRIFIED OF HIS DRAGON DICK.
My husband is waiting until son is napping and air humps as a seduction tactic. Pray for me.
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