do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
He was putting purell on my boobs saying "they need to be clean for later." He hadn't had a drink all night
I have started doing my homework in bars. It just feels right.
when i was alone, his dick was there for me...
Taking shots out of pine wood derby trophiesssssss. best idea ever.
dude. this chick is staring at me like i gave her brother herpes.
She was puking in a plastic bag while cleaning where she puked on the floor. She knows how to multitask.
So not only did you shoot down my invitation and prob walked past my house but now ur excluding me from a wet t shirt contest which btw i totally would have won
Power went out. She lit a candle and gave me head. Made some pretty impressive candlelight cocksucking shadowpuppets. Must be what porn was like in olden times.
I decided staying home, watching porn and masterbating was a much better choice than the gym. And I was right.
Noo.... Like in the attic of a crack house with nitrous and fat chicks weird....
CODE RED CODE RED MY VIBRATOR IS BROKEN THIS IS NOT A DRILL
My mom just asked me if I knew what Buzzfeed was. Then said she's watching the second Magic Mike for the bodies. Please help.
Also I know now I was meant to be a comedian. Had both arresting officers laughing.
Still had our rainbow strip poker new years tradition. End of night we were only wearing mask.
Did you get the usual surprise pics from the strange straight you like to sprinkle in.
Randomize
