Tell her to GTFO!!!!! JAI HO!!!!!
naighbors jacking off again. i swear its his friday night ritual, its like he knows the night wont be ending in his favor
its hard to take this fight seriously when one dude is an oompa loompa, and the other is a "g spot"
If a video of someone that looks like me banging that chick on the hood of her car in some parking lot suddenly shows up on the web... let me know, I gotta see how that turned out.
At what point did you actually think that you could throw knives safely?
Sorry I dragged you across a parking lot
I just took a dump to end all dumps. Other dumps have already written ballads about it. It was the Armageddon dump. Bruce Willis was there, it was awful.
That last minute feeling of hesitation on whether I should bring my health card to the bar usually means I'm in for a good night.
Weird come down, just saw a woman on the train go to grab something and realised she had terrifying hands. They literally filled me with dread. I don't think I'm ok.
Yeah. I mean it wasn't that awkward. I just made conversation like there was absolutely no lack of pants.
So ive come to the realization that my affinity for tattooed guys makes me the literal definition of tit for tat
I believe in your delicious
I'm glad you got documented proof of my stupidity with a head full of nitrous
Hahaha and I'm glad you are doing whip its at a childrens basketball game
The shitshow that was last night is the gift that just keeps on giving
And by "sexually intimate," you mean fuck buddies?
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