did I really admit that id have sex with that cougar had I been more drunk?...ugh...i need to masterbate more
Do you think there are girls out there that really do like small penis?
I think they should rename 16 and pregnant to "I was fucked in highschool and all I got was a baby and humiliated infront of the nation on MTV"
Just woke up. My philosophy paper is a play, and my paper for musical theater is about physics. That's some dank shit you sold me
She saved the condom from the first time we did it.
He said he loved me so I pretended not to hear it because I don't think "I love your penis" was the response he was looking for.
It was so weird. I had like an out of body experience. I heard the moaning, but I didn't know it was me.
i just bought plan b at the bus station. happy holidays and welcome to a new level of white trashiness.
The sex I just had was not worth missing a girls night out.
Remember when spice girls "Two Become One" came on just as we were about to fuck? talk about a boner jam
I wasn't concerned until I realized he was using the vase my birthday flowers came in as a " big glass" for his 151 and coke.
Judge me all you want, but while you are stuck at home eating Ramen and tap water, I will be dining with some guy who, although might be the same age as my father, is filthy rich.
Last thing I remember was a hand in the pants. Then I woke up next to a full beer and a McDouble, which I promptly had for breakfast.
I just noticed, at some point last night I got on iTunes and purchased over 100 classical piano songs.
My purse is full of condoms and money.
I like where this is going...
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