Pretty sure she's used to bigger guys. She kept slipping off while on top. like, constantly
Instead of a promise ring i got my clit peirced, its a promise that ill always give you ass! =]
Deffinety need to stop having sex on the beach just took a dump and it was mostly sand
I just remembered before I gave him head I couldn't find a hair tie and he offered to hold my hair up. Maybe we were wrong.. Maybe he does have a heart.
He said he had to make up a lie of why he couldnt sleep with her. It must really suck to have a sunburned dick.
Literally just stood in the shower and forgot what to do. that hungover.
Dude i was hungover i didnt know she was in the shower, she screamed i screamed we all screamed and i just so happend to piss in the shower.
You stood next to him taking HUGE gasps of air in an attempt to second hand smoke his cig because you didn't have one...
I've taken to hiding pictures of us around his room so that he'll forever feel guilty for dumping me on Valentine's Day... And to potentially cock block any hook ups.
how was it?
he was petting the bushes because they were "napkins"
Went to 7-11 to buy condoms with the $20 I found on the ground outside Rite Aid. A good day for drug stores
I'm writing off my condom expenses in my taxes
I just ordered a onesie on amazon in the back of the ambulance while my patient was sleeping. I'm an adult
I'm driving to work hungover. I feel like I got hit by a train and then drank that train too.
I’m looking forward to our Cougar years. These freshmen know how to fuck
Randomize
