We stole some shitttt from king sooper's. fuck yeaaa
what did you steal
frozen pizza, cat litter, and preperation H. not much different than my usual grocery list.
I feel fat after drinking my meal replacement shake.
I added chocolate sauce, a bsg of m&ms and a crushed up brownie to make it taste better.
I'm not 100% sure, but I think someone gave me a bath last night...
yep. it's official. for $40 they will let you lick the stripper pole.
Drunk you is everything I aspire to be in life.
"The juvenile turned and faced the officer, unzipped his pants, placed a fresh cigarette in between his legs and preceded to light it with a match"
It was just like old times except for going to hangover throw up before waking my parents up to open presents. Merry Christmas!
Believe it or not, that's part of the whole 'best friend' thing. It's not just yelling at me for making you leave the club early or taking the couch bc I'm doing sex while you're doing bjs.
She said she'd heard about my nickname in high school. Apparently sledgehammer isn't as popular as you'd believe...
You will never truly trust yourself until you have shaved your armpits, legs, and vagina in the dark.
Do I not have a Brazilian bc of my boyfriend situation or do I not have a boyfriend bc of my brazilian situation?
It was one of those "how did I get to my bed and what am I wearing" mornings.
I should not be this drunk in a place where a girl is wearing a princess dress
dont ever go to laser tag drunk. you will be judged.
Is it bad that I'm not at all bothered by the fact that to some people I'm simply known as the girl that takes her shirt off?
Randomize
