party started at 10. cops are coming to shut us down now and its 11. i already lostmy underwear and im wearing a sparkly thong on my haed. this has to be some kinda record.
waiting in line for my ID. the kid in front of me reaks of hopes and dreams and hornyness-- freshmen by calvin klein
She told me she was a cowboys fan... I told her it was a waste of a perfect set of tits
He had to pee in the sink beside my head because the girl that I was taking care of was passed out on the toilet. To answer your question: yes i took a peek. Thats why we hooked up later.
I'm telling you the guy came in bought a box of condoms and all three of the chicks that came in behind him followed him to his car. I want his life
Just saw your girl from last night... Be embarrassed
Nicole, you can't keep coming over at 3am wanting to build igloos.
He sent a pic, I sent one back. Then nothing. It's like we sext-messaged goodbye and ended the relationship.
come find me. Outside the bar we were just in waving my syringe in the air
You screamed "there will be blood" and punched some random guy in the face. So no, we can't go back to that bar.
Then you jumped in the pool because your were convinced the scratches on your neck from the cat were gills and you could breathe underwater.
God dammit not the cupcake channel. Not when I'm high.
There's a naked man in my car right now.
Apparently I was directing traffic outside of Keeneland. Apparently I'm not a police officer. Who knew....
Broken heels while double fisting margaritas, picking up shirtless, bloody men and escorting them out of harms way, the meltdown when I realized I can go without a bra bc my boobs shrunk, the morning vodka red bull you were forced to drink? Which one roped you in?
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