He was all up on my grill like I was having a BBQ. I DONT EVEN KNOW HOW TO USE A GRILL.
I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
Its Shannon Doherty lazy not Forest Whittaker lazy
Just saw a squirrel crossing the road in a crosswalk..my morning has improved exponentially.
but there are maragaritas for $3 so that was all i needed to hear
I got a job at a micro-brewery. Now who made the bigger mistake, them or me?
at least the person I hooked up with donates to charity, the shirt I was wearing this morning was his relay for life shirt.
I am dressed. And we didn't do anything. He's gorgeous and tall tho. Something nice to look at when I'm hungover
Ummmm you know you're drinking vodka out of a Skittles bag, right?
I found a bag of weed while packing. Now packing is like creating tiny universes inside of boxes.
It was just...long. I started around 2. And I think i went to bed around 2. So 12 straight hours? I remember a milkshake and frozen grapes.
Too bad pet owners lack respect for my training in ancient Buddhist and holistic rehab therapies.
I'm not sure the Buddhist consider pot brownies holistic rehab therapy
Listen I took a family sized bottle of merlot to the face last night and there's an svu marathon on. Give me some time please.
This bitch goes out driving during the nor'easter to get her ass eaten.. that’s dedication
your mission the party friday: cockblock me at ALL costs. I've cheated on my boyfriend twice. I feel like three times would be crossing some sort of line...
and no, I don't care how how hot he is
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