i just deleted quailman, hot hawaiian dude, appalachian swimmer, and connecticut from my phone
still haven't packed clothes. only wine. gotta love spring break
she was sobbing drunk in the backseat about her dead cat and how the guy in the front seat didn't want to hook up with her
the remote is under the fat chick passed out on the couch. Good luck .. and may god have mercy on your soul.
Just asking. Could've given you a lap dance in a sombrero, drenched in corona and tequila.
God Bless cinco de mayo
it's like if youve been living with the grinch for 15 yrs and then santa shows up with a big gift begging to fuck the christmas spirit back into you. no one can say no to santa.
You know it's been a rough year when your therapist mouth is just wide open. And I didn't even get to the real issue!
So is that the only criterion for shenanigans now? Don't die?
I accidentally left my shirt at my booty calls house. He washed it & hung it up for me in his closet. I can't decide if that's sweet or creepy
you could be the only one getting laid right now....yet your sitting in here making goat noises
I just did my taxes to sober up, I'm THAT hungover
I was just dry heaving outside of the Chem building when a guided tour walked by. Welcome to the Maritimes kids...
I have dined. Now I want to get fucked.
I'm not big on drama but you need to put your pants on and leave.
I ate at the cafeteria for the first time yesterday and today I think I had an hour long fart.
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