I wanna wear you like a flannel shirt
i should go to a nude beach and wear just a condom, then ill have tan lines on my dick
Working on an important paper into the wee hours of the morning, and every time I type the word "situation," I can't help but think of effing Jersey Shore. Those guidos are now ruining my academic life.
like a sex slave...but with a better dental insurance plan
Well, i'm not sure how that works so i wish both you and your vagina luck on your voyage.
His "hunger Strike for change" lasted 4 days. Hi welcome to my coke binge last weekend....not impressed
I can't break up with him, I ran the math. Taking into account his 7 inch penis and the standard deviation from average, almost 90% of guys should have a smaller penis than he does.
Really? Penis math? This is why guys shouldn't date female engineers.
Why is there a frozen condom filled with water in my freezer?
gave him road head on the way to his grandparents house. purposely didn't let him finish, the sexual tension over turkey was indescribable.
we fucked and then he hand fed me a hot pocket
I don't even have his number. I have his pants tho
I fully support your bad decision but I do not approve of your unironic use of the word yolo
It's almost like sex was the ice breaker and now we're sociable at the gym
He showed me a picture of his family on Instagram and his dad was my Sugar Daddy. ABORT.
Just calm down. My foot long super joint and I will be over shortly.
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