Oh shit. I just had to lure him into the bedroom so I could take the list of his negative qualities off the fridge so he wouldn't see.
Bring booze and chicks. Separate, or one already in the other. Your call.
it was 5AM and you were field goal kicking solo cups into the sink
Talking about the game in the closet with a banana wearing sunglasses.
My neighbor asked me to tell you to stop changing in front of their house. Do I even want to know?
I'm not sure what happened last night but I woke up next to him and I was wearing nothing but my grandpa's diabetic socks, so I'm letting that fill in the blanks.
Any formal decision about whether we're planning to objectify naked women with daddy issues tonight?
Go big or go home. Or get a live in house boy you met 7 years ago and feel like you have unfullfilled potential. You know, the usual
yesterday pre dick pic he said "no disrespect to your situation but i cant wait to get ahold of you again in the future" is this how people network??
Is it weird that my ex and the dude I'm talking to now both only have one testicle? Apparently I've found my type..
Tempting guys with beer and cheese. How Midwestern are we?
What happened?
New Orleans
Every time
All I remember was you telling him there was something behind him so he would turn around and you could slide down his carpeted stairs on your belly without a shirt on. How's that carpet burn btw?
hey can you send me that pic of that dude?...if this isn't Rochelle's phone...can you please find and tell Rochelle to send me that picture of that dude?
He cut off part of his middle finger playing the knife game while singing The Knife Game Song at the top of his lungs. He also scream like a girl when his finger hit the floor and he realized he fucked up.
Randomize
