I just blew up the bathroom at work and now I feel like a new woman
I'm pretty sure "Like A Prayer" will forever remind me of drunk nights & pants down around the ankles
I just saw a girl walking home wearing a tshirt, boxers, and cowboy boots. Thanks for having the decency to drive me to my car.
I don't think we should have started that trash fire
Hovering on the line between her being fuckable and me being too drunk to fuck. Life's juggling act in progress here.
Also I had a dream we made my birth control into a joint. What does that mean?
I may hire someone just to sell my family the drugs they keep asking me for. It's cutting into my doing drugs time.
well it can jab him in the chin so I am 100% sure he can suck his own dick
On the way home there was a guy passed out IN the road on Colfax with his pants around his ankles, completely bare assed. If he was dressed as a speed bump, he succeeded.
Honestly you'd think more guys would be happy to date a cute female dealer, but apparently something about safety or whatever
yeah, never be friends with someone with shitty eyebrows.. they obviously already make poor life choices
I think I fell asleep on the dance floor at one point...but played it off cool and acted like I just did the robot.
We were walking to the bar with a group of people and literally made 4 stops in people's lawns garages or random walls for him to eat me out
We will discuss everything tomorrow i presume. Including the sweaty naked tango.
Right. He was like "I'll be here all night if I have to..." I was like "Well then, I'll have to call the cops..."
Randomize
