love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
The google font looked peculiar last night, but then up close I realized it was just dry vomit.
say it with me now .. the "golden" penis. his nickname does not disappoint.
hey tell your friend im sorry for licking his mouth, that was probably inappropriate
Nice. I ate a jello shot out of a bovine blow up doll's love hole last night
Ive made peace with the fact that i will accomplish nothing except liver damage today
You. Me. A bottle of Vodka. The wilderness.
Jail is not for me. They portion control your meals and I don't really like that.
I'm not sure drinking my way through west nile virus is the best idea. Oh well, already committed to that plan.
Steaks?
It's Ash Wednesday.
If you really think that not eating meat on a weeknight is going to keep you out of hell, fine. Can I use that chimichurri you made?
I feel like parents watching our children. You want to step in and help them but you just have to let them make their mistakes
... and smoked a joint with my new landlord. I'm starting to like Germany.
Someone somewhere has a picture of me vomiting in a bus stop trash can while a drag queen held my hair for me.
Pride claims another victim
We were 6 minutes into the movie before we realized the whole movie was spoken in Italian. That level of stupidly-ripped
I had to break up with her. She was sending me study schedules and recipes for vegan lasagna. I’m just trying to survive man
Randomize
