made out with the bouncer to distract him from how illegitimate my fake id is.
We got so high we made milksteak
I would give away a ton of these clothes but I doubt there are any homeless people who dress as slutty as me
At the bar dressed as a taco. not a typo. Come down.
just did a beer bong in the shower while i was taking an actual shower its officially football time
Yup, totally tried cooking bacon in the dryer last night.
you know it's gonna be a good 4/20 when you start saving up for it in january.
do you remember when we thought we were both knocked up by the same guy like two days apart and would have half twins? Thats a best friend moment.
We tried lying really still and being really quiet so that he wouldn't notice us before he left the room. Forgot about the glow in the dark condom.
My breasts were aching with rage.
He kept singing Happy Birthday to himself, yelling at the bouncers for not letting him in, and telling them his "father will hear of this." He was like a drunken Scottish Draco Malfoy.
WAIT MOM THIS DOESNT NEED TO BE A FAMILY EVENT OK AARON DOESNT NEED TO BE AROUND FOR NIPPLEGATE 2014
He got hotter. I'm offended on behalf of the rest of our graduating year.
The man sent me a video of him doing the helicopter, the least I can do is go visit him in the hospital
I just took a plan B pill with my preworkout. That's the level I'm on today.
Randomize
