Strawberries are so good its weird that food is growable
I've done 29 out of the 30 things to do to a naked man according to Cosmo. I don't know if that makes me innovative or slutty.
Genius.
The sun is out and the snow is finally starting to melt here... Vodka bottles keep popping up everywhere. Guess it's the college version of burying nuts for the winter
I should have to wear a sign around the rest of the day so everyone knows the shame I feel.
I've woke up in his bed 4 out of the past 6 mornings. I feel like this might be the time to learn more about him then his first name and what kind of beer he drinks.
Just fucked in a kitchen. I never want my penis that close to knives, stoves, or blenders ever again.
I want a bunch of melted cheese. or a penis. or a penis covered in melted cheese
I mean there is a rehab there so its gotta be a good time
The number of times I have seen your cock and the number of times I have wanted to see your cock are different!
I'm eating cereal out of a cocktail shaker. That kind of blizzard.
It was an all night sausage fest and I was the lady of honor.
Was Mr. ROBOT good? I missed it. I just fucked dental hygienist on the trampoline in my backyard
8 minutes into the New Year and and I've already sent a nude...new year, new me?
she chased shots of jack with a fucking steak. i'm in love.
Definitely went to court without a bra and panties because Mr. LastNight’s dog stole them. I guarantee you I was the only lawyer going commando in court
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