i cant decide if i should go fuck j*** or keep watching real genius
As a matter of fact my bong is named Hulkamania brother
I don't know if the fire truck was perfect timing or if she actually burned something down.
She walked into class late sat down for 5 min muttered 'oh i cant do this' and walked out. She looked like death.
We should party with her soon
dude chill. we stole 18 hamburgers from her house
no. you cant fuck a burger.
so, she was so drunk she tried stabbing me with a corn dog stick
We need large glitter to throw at people to signify our mystic nature
Fuck their feelings and their drinks they will get hit with sparkly confetti
Turns out he has a 6pack too. Alright adorable snapchatting manwhore dude, you win.
A homeless man gave him a blanket and an ambulance drove him to sarahs...
After a while I was so wet that I started crying. HE MADE ME SO HORNY I WEPT.
I lose my morals, my dignity, and my selfie stick :(
We should buy t shirt guns and blow eggs out of them at his house. Bachelorette party
THE COP WHO TOOK MY MUGSHOT LAST NIGHT JUST ADDED ME ON FACEBOOK
Have you ever seen death before? Bc it's me right now in yesterday's clothes.
It's a family event: you have to drink. No way around it. Its the law.
Randomize
