Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
Apparently i was the first person to introduce her to her clitoris. Needless to say...they hit it off great
I have big tits. Rules don't apply to me.
Promise me that if I become one of those sad people that facebook pesters you to 'reconnect with' you'll tell me so I can delete mine and save myself the humiliation?
I put cups full of chips next to every bed, couch, and toilet so that everyone could have a snack when they woke up....
they told me her nickname is "wizard sleeve"
pick me up NOW
I had to sleep with my math professor to pass algebra. Apparently my blowjobs are only C+ quality
I'm celebrating tres de junio so if you can help me find some sombreros ill be grateful. Also, today in 1992 Aborigines were granted rights to their land so I might need some boomerangs.
I just realized his fb pic was taken in a public bathroom.
I bruised his dick. I bruised his dick WITH MY MOUTH!! I've never felt more accomplished.
We need large glitter to throw at people to signify our mystic nature
Fuck their feelings and their drinks they will get hit with sparkly confetti
Yeah he told me he wanted a serious relationship, but he's posting pictures of his dick on Kik.
we played his NES Classic. Turns out there is a warp zone to my vagina.
ill give you some hints: blood, carnival, fog machine, happy meal.
How did I end up in some random dudes car?
Some guy came up to you and asked if you knew how to drive stick.
Randomize
