Oh man I wish you'd been in the car w/ me today. I followed a school bus home filled w/ young boys and I flipped them off the entire way. They loved it.
I am at the point in my high where i now know/understand chinese.
so while trying to be a healthier drunk i discovered that putting airborne in natty is not an advisable decision
At what point did I eat out of your mouth?
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
i yelled out "tuesday" during orgasim. he fucked me into 2 days from now.
nah, they dropped the charges. apparently ripping his junk when he tried to hop the fence seemed like punishment enough...
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
We ended up at an Asian frat. I made out with two Mexicans at the same time and I pulled a muscle in my leg from twerking too low. Diversity.
When you are 21 it's acceptable to run out of the tavern and puke all over the bike rack... when you are 35 it's called alcoholism.
Does it get any better than dating a guy with a vasectomy? The answer is NO. No it does not
I can't control his boners. I can only encourage them.
I just want you to know you're the worst sister ever.
If this is about me and your ex, it's not my fault she doesn't like men.
My mother is currently smoking weed with a dying bee so his last moments aren't miserable. And she wonders why I rescued a grasshopper missing a leg.
went to class still drunk this morning and my professor made the class give me a round of applause and said, "see people, THIS is inspirational... if she can make it to class in this condition there is no excuse not to show up!"
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