break up sex still means we will always be broken up.
Vanessa Carlton's songs would be so much better if she was pretty
Just saw the hottest 4 garbage men ever. They should make a calendar
I feel like I just walked the hall of shame thru the marriott. Everyone stared.
I think it was the shoes and limping. Not the sex. I could b wrong.
until he told me my vag was like a juicy apple and he loved eating it, yes, i really did think we were both sober.
What's a quick way to get over an ex-boyfriend? To hear about how he threw up in a cup and then drank it. That's how.
I have her designated blowjob hair tie on my wrist. It's like a key to eternal happiness
Please put me in a whole with no windows and never let me out.
Also yeah I would definitely have to say that one of my favorite things to do is to get high and pet cats.
Just retrieve me from the bathroom floor when you're done
You are a lesbian wizard with red hair. You are willow
I got with a bridesmaid and a server as well as put an $80 tab in rum and coke under the name Emerson Iglesias. Are you sure it wasn't my wedding?
wheres my face? and why is my pocket so big?
A guy I don't even know just ate me out on a washing machine at a random persons afterparty. I came as it was going through spin cycle.Just kept thinking "who does laundry during a party?"
They got skeletons in the booths to enforce social distancing.
Thought they were weekend at berniesing that shit at first.
Randomize
