Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
Even Lady Gaga hates Purdue
Just made a coke joke and literally drooled on myself. How do we feel about pavlov's theory of conditioning now?
I swear to god he's a one man village people.
seriously my hangover is so bad I feel like my eye lashes make blinking a workout
Yes. Yes. Double yes. I'll bring the tits. You bring the frosting.
Me. You. Shitty green clothes from Savers that we will dub alligator costumes. Middle of the quad tomorrow at noon. Bring your alligator voice and the pearls before swine comic.
I may or may not be negotiating a deal of baked goods for socks...keep you posted
THERE IS A WINE CUBE IN MY ASS THIS IS NOT GOING AS PLANNED
We should discuss this later when sobriety has returned. Right now he's just like a distant cousin.
it is my last wish that my tale be published posthumously as a warning to anyone thinking of eating burger king at nine am
I did get to watch you pee, tho. That counts as another precious moment.
I'll truly miss your penis but your use of words and phrases such as bae, yolo, swag, and totes have ruined how attractive you once were.
He stopped mid-fuck to explain his choice in pillows. HE WAS STILL IN ME!
My professor just told my lab he could drive us around town in his 1991 Lincoln towncar limo for our bar crawl. This just keeps getting better!
Randomize
