Amandyke just told me shes gonna make my tongue her cum rag. i'm borderline terrified
so im watching realhousewives of jersey with my mom. she just said they werent really rich bc they were doing their own makeup.
He just posted pic of sad weiner and half a butt cheek. That is it. I HATE online dating.
I would give my right arm to go back to college. Or maybe not. Would be kinda hard to pick up guys with one arm. Then again, knowin what I do now...I could take any freshman bithc with only one arm.
Reindeer Drinking Games will soon commence. Get over here while we're still sober enough to answer the door.
This is working out surprisingly well considering it started out with us using a christmas tree as a battering ram
I woke up with like grass burns all over my body, i'm pretty sure i made out with someone under a bus. . . but i'm not sure
my liver gets a handicap on account of the whole being diseased thing
Maybe you shouldn't go to cosmic bowling, i don't know if cum glows and I don't wanna find out i'm sure his parents don't either.
I'd love to sympathize with you but I'm drunk in a mansion
All I've eaten today is cookie dough, pecan pie and three shots of jack. Finals week here I come.
I said geronimo as I came I'm not sure if he appreciated the doctor who reference or was just confused
Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
So this is my life now? Laying in bed texting about Hulk penis?
Setting myself up for trouble? Yes. But getting laid is a lot more important at this time.
Randomize
