Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
You know you are bi when you flip between the NFL Network and LOGO.
there was a party in your bed and you weren't invited... change your sheets
She forced me to throw up so it would "rejuvenate" me. It worked and then we took six more shots and did a keg stand. You know what I call that? Friendship.
Maybe you should go over there and lead him on and reach down his pants like he's about to get some and yank his balls.
That's the best idea I've heard all day.
We are gonna be 90 years old in wheelchairs at the nursing home sitting at computers poking each other and waiting for the other to die so we will have the last facebook poke.
Just warning you now f you do not get intoxicated with me in front of the family on thanksgiving we are not related.
So I found the perfect "Yeah I gained weight since high school but it went to all the right places" outfit for the reunion this weekend.
So as I left the Australian's hotel room, I said "Welcome to America. You're going to do just fine here."
Dude, he threw a pool chair off of an 8 story building. It was a successful night I'd say.
One good thing about being really drunk when you go out to dinner is that the leftovers are a surprise. These quesadillas had shrimp in them! Who knew?
After we had breakup sex it took him longer to say goodbye to my boobs than it did to me...
My kid made a secret wish that you have a baby... Make good choices today!
Side note: I apologize for sex being the subject of every single one of my texts. That's what happens when you date an older man who constantly denies you sex on the basis of his ridiculous morals.
The career specialist read an Onion article to us. Please send help.
Randomize