C thinks vomiting on the batroom floor = reaon not to party. Lies. Party continues.
I fell asleep next to my cousin and woke up with my hand in her pants because i though it was lisa
I didnt believe in cockblocking untill my roomate brought home that.
i'm going to look back at this as the time of my life when i casually dated that autistic guy
I left two shots of jager for you guys when you wake up from your death. Do with it as you wish
judging from the number of limes and box of kosher salt on the counter therell be 8.5 gallons of tequila drunk this weekend.
sounds about right
Dude, you flipped off a cat from my balcony and yelled at it to get a house
All I've consumed in the last 24 hours is cranberry vodka and kosher for passover biscotti
That's what happens when you party with the tribe
4 out of 7 roommates in one month isn't that bad if you think about the fact that 3 of them were in the last 24 hours
I tried to find an emoji but none convey my excitement for receiving good sex soon
It's decided. Tomorrow I'm getting a Big Mac and a Dildo
Somehow his homemade liquor activated memories of my semester abroad three years ago. I ended up yelling random medical advice in German, while my roommates played dress-up with the cat stoned out of their minds. I consequently gave up on dating. Back in the ONS game.
They left a cherry picker with the keys in it on a college campus, what else were we supposed to do?
This is the worst drive ever. Im hungry, hungover, i gotta shit so bad, and the only radio station im getting clearly is playing alvin and the chipmunks christmas songs
At Target. Everyone is stocking up on food and flashlights for this storm. I stocked up on beer. Dont judge me, it was on sale...
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