Im wearin a dollar bill hat and tgkin a big girl home. Lifi is gmwnd
very cute, but more "I wanna put you in my pocket and keep you as a pet" and less "please bang me" type of cute.
the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
She bit a glass in half.
She was our DD the least I could do is have sex with her. Even when drunk I'm still chivalrous.
I'm chugging Gatorade because i drank something called a trashcan and someone named Gianna diamond has my credit card number, and I think I might have ruined my life.
best friends dont let best friends get an STD of the eyeball just saying
I am in macy's and just straight up heard an old lady taking a crap in her depends.
I'm still tasting pancake mix. I think this may actually be a serious medical problem...
well, obviously he didn't fuck me for my strong moral fiber.
he says he is going to get you very high and make you leave the country with him
possibly by boat
Can we go one day without you telling me that your dick misses me
Btw I did not technically have a dick in me but I was naked in bed with a man during the last finals game so that is why the Warriors won
THERE IS A BABY THAT ISN'T MINE THAT'S GOING TO HEAR ME BEING SEXED!
I woke up with what has to be a whole pack of smarties loose in my bra. Was that your fault?
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