I just found out the guys at work had a bet as to who could sleep with me before i move away.
Who won?
All of them.
Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
We walked because you started screaming when you finally realized he wasn't Ben Bailey and it wasn't the Cash Cab.
Does he not understand that naked slip and slide needs supervision after dark?!
He ran headfirst into the atm. Thenasmed us what our spirit animals were...he said his was either a dolphin or a cabbage
I think I slept in the cheesecake last night. Either that or I had a wet dream. Whatever happened I need to wash my pants.
Hey remember that thing i said about never apologizing for being a hot mess? Well that was before you found me drunk in the hallway with no pants.
I just traded 5 cigarettes for a sandwich on they greyhound.You owe me 5 cigarettes. I told you I would get hungry.
That guy has been pretty randomly in and out of my vagina for 4 years...I don't think I'm required to tell him when I'm dating.
Good point.
Just saw a dude take a shot in the parking lot in his car. Too early in the semester for that
Someone has big plans this weekend. Just went to throw away the trash and saw packaging for 3 different vibrators on the top of the stack
I would ride that face into the sunset
you're the only girl i know who can be too sick to walk to the kitchen and still have enough game to receive multiple orgasms
so idk what that means but now because of me he has a police file as breaking into my apartment and sleeping in my hallway under the carpet
Why does my mask smell like doritoes?
Randomize
