Why is it that you only get to have sex when you haven't shaved your legs in six weeks and are wearing period stained granny panties?
Last night was so much fun. i kept trying to lick everyone
Just a heads up. Everytime I get arrested in Maine I claim I lost my ID and use your name.
Its only.eleven and we are already chasing a man on a bike with a bag full of burger king
So apparently we wrote "Lube Shopping" in Paula's diary on every friday for the rest on the year....
I think I was the only one who knew you were acting like you weren't drunk in public issues discussion this morning. Make sure you thank me in your Academy Award Speech someday.
Would it be weird to jack off in the hospital?
There is a guy in class using a wine bottle as a water bottle. Welcome to the Faculty of Environment.
He's a loser but she says we just don't see the good stuff about him. It's like she's dating the Charlie Brown Christmas Tree.
why do guys have to express their feelings when they know your seeing someone else ? I fucked him anyways to make him feel better , and to know what he's missing.
I want a dick in my left hand and a Crunch Wrap Supreme in my right hand.
Don't be upset because I bitch slapped you with intelligence
Why did my mother make you get naked?
Did you mark a random day on my calendar as National Seth Day?
Sounds like a legit day to me.
Convinced if I was being murdered in my house no one would come and save me. If no one heard my 10000000 orgasms last night, there is no hope.
Randomize