I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
You told me you were allowed to keep eating butter because it had just passed midnight and you were on the next day's daily fat servings
nothing says "we're all in this together" like the herpes she passed around to our entire group of friends
Let's enter the circle of trust. Are we there yet? Ok. If I somehow hypothetically slept with Amandas ex husband...on a scale of one to ten...how bad is that?
The hot guy sitting next to me in the lib is reading a book called "Impersonal sex in public places." How wrong would it be to give him my number when I bounce?
My favorite bartender added me on Facebook. Now he can clearly see how under 21 I am
I swear she lies about being allergic to gluten so she'll get all the jack and not have to drink shitty beer like the rest of us
She put a shot in my mouth and then hit me with a pillow..
And at the semi-adult age of 25 I have shit my pants. Not even drunk, just really late to work. Is this real life?
lets go to sea world and you can just hit on every guy in a wetsuit until you get lucky
The night was crazy enough that we did a workout. Instructed by the bouncer at 2am
I just can't have sex in the car again. it's just too much
I just realized that you're going to be drunk for daylight savings time again. Godspeed.
not sure what stings more, my ass or my pride...
We're about to get drunk and it feels wrong without you
Randomize
