Her little brother was home, so we had to hook up while playing hide and seek with him
is it really high of me to have brought my own hot sauce to wendys?
I've hooked up with six guys in my ethics class next semester...I feel like I've failed already
i need to find a notary that isn't going to turn me in for blatantly lying to the us and chilean governments
Judging by my dry clothes and wet sheets, I think I might have gotten out of bed, pissed ON it, covered it up, and passed out on top of it
We have a tower of vodka coming. OF VODKA
Well, let me tell you, it was the most vivid sex dream I've ever had. More so than the Paris Hilton one I had in 05. And about as weird.
What's life without a lamp shade you wore home?
You don't have anything to lose--we've established that he's not going to murder you and he smells good.
Please send me a thumbs up pic afterwards. No homo. After you've redressed and are heading for the walk of shame out of course
Side note: Hot guys are now getting with ugly chicks. Alert the media.
Our group of friends now have more broken bones than reasonable excuses for why they're broken.
I just want to smoke this blunt and eat pizza rolls while watching The Price Is Right with you.
I know. It was just so disappointing. I almost made it. And now the "when's the last time you peed your pants" clock has restarted. Lol
I just slapped myself in the face with my dildo and I know that's a weird thing to share but I just had to tell to someone omg I'm laughing so hard
Randomize