I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
part of it is the fact that im problem drinking, and the other part is my OCD wont let me leave the bottle half-empty.
Nothing says "I'm a sorority girl" like puking at 830 in the am, wearing my anti-hazing pin, and getting ready for a tea party.
I SWALLOWED her nuva ring. Please tell me how your night could have been worse.
Strip beer pong in the front yard? Of course the cops showed up
The cops knocked on our door just to ask us if we were really having a no-pants party.
I thought it went well, but he just sent me a video of me sucking an icicle on the fire escape of his building with the caption "The ice got more than I did." Somehow I feel like I owe him a blowjob.
Random Survey Question: If things start getting serious with this cop, do I have to stop doing coke?
I just ate beer and cupcakes for breakfast.... maybe this fourth of july won't be so bad
The only flat surface we had was a cheez it box so we snorted the blow off of that. Rock bottom really isn't that bad.
Fucking holidays. How do I have this many men who want to fuck me and none of them are available when I'm ready to blow my top?
I just licked a piece of cheese off my phone screen if that makes you feel any better
This whole quitting my bad habits all at once is really messing with my ability to function.
I just had a dream that I was fighting Donald Trump... Gotta stop watching the news before bed
That's just how I roll. I drink, then tell people I'm either not wearing underwear or I'm training to be a stripper.
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