no i did not stop my best friend from eating out my sister...bros before hoes
Not quite sure what happened last night. I'll drive your dresser over to you later.....
He tried to fight me not realizing that I work as a bouncer in the the same bar we were in. His night ended with him in handcuffs, missing teeth, PLUS I got his shots that he ordered since he didn't get to drink them.
Wanna hang out? my DILF had to dip out for his sons little league game
Come now. I'm bloody but I'll give you the best fuck of your life.
I managed to get through my meeting without throwing up in someone else's office, so there's that for an accomplishment today.
Because making bad decisions is what makes our house great and I don't plan on changing that anytime soon.
Nothing kills the mood like him going to slap my ass and he hits his balls at the same time
Then, he ate me out while I watched Bo Burnham. Best. Night. Ever.
And why in he fuck did I get 'dick' in Romanian tattooed on my forearm
Girl. There is no more toilet paper. You should have seen the twerking I just did to shake the pee off.
is 250 jello shots considered an open container?
Hahaha wearing a fake moustache in public was the best idea i ever had
If he doesn’t slap your ass with his drumsticks, then I don’t wanna hear about it.
Of course my parents remember you. You showed them your tits
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