when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
why weren't you at the audition last night?
booty call before role call
She brought up feelings... her days are numbered
you should break up with her....give her the gift of reality
Waking and baking has revolutionized how i brush my teeth. Seriously up to like 25 min everry morn. Highly recommend
You are the only one who would stop a bum, tell him to open up, then pour straight vodka in his mouth. You made his year.
Dude she's famous. She's on an episode of campus pd. Can't not fuck her
Well I pulled a muscle in my leg dancing in the tanning booth drunk at 1 pm soooo there's that
I've got to stop giving the gift of vagina for every occasion. I'm exhausted.
We should discuss this later when sobriety has returned. Right now he's just like a distant cousin.
2 reasons we need to wear those onesies to the bar more ofter 1) comfy as shit 2) we both still got laid\n\nHow can you resist that kinda night?
He just kept mumbling that he was too drunk for society and then he peed in a bush
The morning after your company Xmas party and that moment you're eating a block of cheese in bed wearing a sequin blazer and recalling all the details of your one night stand with a coworker who happened to start that day...fuck.
Woke up with a girls naked next to me I had her thong on somehow.
Even after hearing me fuck his friend twice in one night, he still follows me around like a puppy.
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