Just saw the pics you left in my phone. thanks for reminding me that last night was not a dream.
since when did accompanying a guy to a wedding mean that anal was required that night?
no you're not listening to me HE WANTED TO BRAID MY HAIR
new excercise plan: walk a mile get a bj then walk a mile home
Dude, if she brings up the lube, you know nothing
He asked me if we could throw a lingerie party together so I guess he's single again
I totally cried the whole time and then screamed out my new therapists name....
There's strippers and bear every where so ether you gave me the wrong address or this is the coolest birthday party thrown for a seven year old ever.
I wish him all the best and hope one day he can afford the surgery to remove his head from his ass
Hurry there's four guys dressed up as a bachelorette party, one has a condom veil and the rest are selling candy bouquets and asking if anyone wants to get laid for $5
He sent me a mirror pic of himself and sent it to me and all i could think about was the amazing bong hits i took with his roommate in that bathroom.
Yeahhh, apparently my brothers think its ok not to check on me if a creeper is talking to me bc i "like those weirdo types"
I'm kinda glad you won't be in Vegas tomorrow because you'd make us go streaking or throw dead animals at them.
CAPS.LOCK.AND.SPACEBAR.ARE.BROKEN.
He passed out while I was riding him but stayed hard long enough for me to orgasm. He definitely earned the blow job I’m going to wake him up with in the morning!
Randomize
